Blank Thoughts

it's monday, and i'm home. feeling weak and a little jittery from the antibiotics that HARDLY HELPED AT ALL.

i'm still going to the toilet.

friday diarrhoea, go see doctor. saturday was still ok, i thought i was getting better, and there was a dinner at some expensive restaurant with my dad's relatives which i had to go. and with that teeny little rich food that i had, i went to toilet on sunday like what, 10 times? more than that?

everyone tells me to see another doctor.

*tears hair* i don't want my stools to be examined!!!!!!!!!! rather, i don't want to collect my shit!!!

much less to be hospitalised ah.

ying was hospitalised for a few days cos she had food poisoning too. supposedly from a fresh abalone she ate at home. vomit vomit vomit.

if you ask me, i rather have diarrhoea. less tiring. just sit on the toilet bowl. and splat. for vomiting, you gotta bend over, and feel your stomach heave and overturn and feel everything gushing outta your mouth. not to mention the aftertaste of a vomiting session.

***intermission***

just came outta toilet. i don't even use toilet paper now. it would have been a raw spot now if i'd used toilet paper each time i go to toilet. like sandpapered raw. so i wash myself and come out with my bottoms all wet.

i'm such a sad case.

i have a bad cough and each night i coughed like i've got tubercolosis. and each time i cough, i'm scared that the force wrecking my body will cause my diarrhoea to shoot out. like, imagine, lungs out of my mouth, and entrails and stomach outta my ass.

what a sight. in fact, last night was a night verging on a scenario like that. i was coughing so badly i woke the whole family up.

am i dying!

my sister was saying something abut having to detoxify after all the junk food we ate during the CNY. i added, "i'm heavily into it right now (and i can't stop)."

oh no.. ......................not again....